Poor lonely red sign board. He tries to smile but his mouth won't nearly turn up enough. He needs a friend. I'll just go to www.hookups4signboards.com and find someone for him... Oh! An answer already!
 

The night table grins sheepishly for being photographed without having dusted the lamp.

Can you see this one? It's in the wood at the bottom of the picture. There's a smiley face, but not a smiley or frowny. It's like a... uh... indifferenty face. Apparently when they changed the elevator controls whenever wayback, the wall couldn't have cared less, and still doesn't.

"I nearly,
[strum strum strum strum]
I nearly lost youuuuu..."

That's the only song I can remember, because boys and girls, that's all they had. So from the Where Are They Now files, now you know that after their brief musical career peak in the early 90s, the Screaming Trees ended up in the wooded portion of my office parking lot.

Thank you for eating Styrobox. We know you have a choice. Keep track of your onion miles and earn a free straw. 

Jolly good, mate, I just returned from the dentist. He says me alignment's the best of his patients in all of England. 

Hey.

Hey.


Hey you! Banana nose stove!


Hey, yeah. I like the bling in your mouth, but ya got knobby knees.
And eyes.
Knobby, knobby, handle-y eyes. 

Kind of like David Bowie with the different colored eyes, but I don't think he has fish lips. I use these plastic plates a lot since they're easy to chuck in the sink or the dishwasher or the trash. 

Her personality's not much to write home about, but when you look her in the face, man, what a dish. Rich too. Born with a silver sp... oh you've heard this one? Right right then, onto the next entry. 

We've had this hutchy-cabinety thing for like a half year, and not 'til we put it next to the recliner (my optimal viewing area) did I notice the Tragedy / Comedy theme in the carvings. It's not obvious, so I gotta sit wonder every time I'm in the recliner whether the carpenter had pms or was bipolar or a thespian or all of those. 

Alright well, I couldn't find a good picture of the seal I wanted, so here's Seal. I wanted the one in the movie Elf with Will Ferrell. I think there was one at least in the beginning of the movie, when Tinkletoes (I suddenly can't remember his name in the movie - is this entry mad cow, or what? [Denny Crane!]) was walking through the animated snowy scene and there were a few North Polish animals chillin' (so to speak) nearby and chattin' with Elfenmagic (what was his name?!). 

I don't know what to say. Sometimes you see a face at the beginning of a meal... and other times it's the end of a meal and there's a hot wing mouse that had a gory-licious run-in with some silver-plated fork tines and ended up splorting creamy peppercorn ranch guts, leaving you to wonder how his tiny foot got way in the middle of the plate, and where's the other foot? The forks not talking. 

Here's the story... of a clicker lady
who was bringing up, uh, some clicker buttons, uh, um... Whatever. You get it. 

Find 5 faces in this gaggle of baskets. Um. I only found 3... What. 

I loved Petey. He was so cute putting his little paws over his ears when Alfalfa was singing. Here he is again on the porch. The ring around his eye hasn't washed off all these years. His smile is just as sky blue as it always was (most people never knew of his blue lips, since Little Rascals was filmed in black & white). In fact I think the only thing that's changed - and it hasn't hurt his looks whatsoever - is the third eye. I do wonder if it developed on its own, or if he decided on the surgery. I'm suspicious particularly of the latter. 

I don't know if you've seen this children's movie but it co-stars my office's security alarm (on the wall, left). The alarm is a character actor, so you may not have heard its name. Anyhoo! Bottom left, in costume, MOA (my office alarm) takes on the role of "Blanky" in the film "The Brave Little Toaster." 

Oh! I am surprised to see you this way! I will! Avert! My acrylic eyes! 

Every so often, I post a picture that is not related to the face thing. I have a deep affection for signs depicting stick people sustaining major injuries. This one is telling you that if you stay still while a soda machine falls on you, some soda will squirt out of 4 places in your skull. So... unless you want that to happen, move out of the way when a soda machine is falling. 

Hoover be seein' two of stuff. How 'bout you and stuff? 

Grover says, "I used to be big. More loveable than Cookie Monster. I could wait tables like nobody even when the customer's voice is like the 6th grade horn section. And I still had energy to maintain my identity as Super Grover on the weekends. Then came that brat Elmo and his friend Zoey. All giggly when you tickle him and with the chicken dance thing. HENSON!! YOU TOOK MY SOUL WITH YOU!!" Grover needs a break from selling his likeness on dog food cans. 

Hey Ant! I'm looking for my coat. I put it on this hook and it must have fallen off. Hey Ant! 

I'm wooking at this box and it's wike wooking in the miwwow.